4am and peaceful slumber is broken by the booming voice of the Jackman.
"Muuuummmmyyyy...did you fowget to get da marshmawwows fwom da shops? Are you gedding dem fwom da shops today Muuuum?".
Silence descends followed by the gentle snores of a little boy dreaming of marshmallows & Gruffalos.
Oh Jackman, you have hit three with such energy and sweetness, I want to savour every minute of it. How does such a giant personality fit into such a little body? When you're not stumping me with your endless questions about the world, you send me into a fit of the giggles with random statements like, "Da pink bits in your eyes, dats where da raindwops come out".
You have the determination of an Olympic athlete and the temper of a Tasmanian Devil. You are inquisitive, fearless and wickedly funny. I will never tire of the way you press your cheek against mine with your arms wrapped around my neck, whispering "I wuv you Muuum, you'we wuvewy". It melts my heart when you tell your big brother that he's your best friend. You make your Daddy's day complete when you rush to greet him as he walks in the door at night. Even when you drive us batty with your fussy eating and night wakings you manage to inevitably say or do something that makes us lose our composure and burst out laughing. You wear your heart on your sleeve and its magical to watch.
On a day like today, when my heart aches with the reality of cancer, you ask if we can play hide'n'seek and it reminds me to really live in the present and not get lost in the what ifs. I feel like the luckiest person on the planet when you're counting to ten while I'm hiding amongst Daddy's suits in the wardrobe, feeling like I'm five years old again, quiet as a mouse, waiting for you to come find me. You and your big brother remind me every day to enjoy and savour this life we have.
I will savour this time and look for the joy.
I love you to the moon and back Jackman.